The King might not have been trying to restrain her, but it had an effect on her like he was. Hot and cold and fear and whatever that thing she had aimed at him that wasn't fear, but sat nestled next to it.
"I'll behave," she promised him. For once, she meant it. She wouldn't be making the same mistake twice in one night at the very least. All the rest could wait. He had a way of leaving her very confused and in bad need of time to process.
She rubbed a hand over her face, trying to rub the emotions off of it and the red out of it. It very almost sounded like he was sorry. It almost sounded alarmingly close to regret. Not regret, obviously, because he didn't regret doing it, but... It was a lot. A lot more than she had expected, and if he didn't stop, she was going to cry.
"I'm not sayin' he didn't deserve it," she said pointedly. "I dunno if you remember him. The Duke of Ark? He owned the lands up around and includin' the Great Lake." She was from around there, as far as she knew. All her earliest memories were from around there, anyway. "If y'remember him, y'might remember he was a real piece o' work." She hadn't known it at the time, obviously. No one thought ill of the people who sheltered them, clothed them, fed them. ...Well, except her, but she was talented at that, and also old enough to know better now. "There's a reason he never signed no fuckin' adoption papers. He never meant to. He's not really my dad."
She rubbed her face again, both hands. "I realized. When I saw all the kids in th' fuckin' castle. I don't wanna think about it." She very, very, very strongly didn't. She could see a spiral of madness that way, if she even acknowledged the way things could have been different. "I don't wanna think about it, and I don't want you t'think about it. Those 'ifs' will drive me insane." If he was going to think anything at all about it, she'd prefer he think of the circumstances she did have, and how they turned her into what she was now, for better or worse. "Besides," she added dryly. "You woulda fuckin' hated havin' me around the castle. Imagine all the rats. That shit's why I'm designin' you an orphanage, anyway."
She blinked at him in surprise. He was just full of them tonight, between getting angry about her crush on Gareth to not rubbing her father's death in her face, and now this. "Yer the first person who's fuckin' understood that. I really dunno what that says about me." Prooooobably nothing good, but it still felt nice to be understood.
She narrowed her eyes a bit at his final enunciation, wondering if she was catching his implications correctly. A flush grew on her cheeks regardless, as if volunteering to confirm his suspicions. "Don't rub it in," she grumbled. "We both know I'm an idiot."
Pleased that she'd created what would hopefully become a permanent nickname for Declan(-Directly-To-The-Ground), she bolted off. Declan-Directly-To-The-Ground, to his credit, at least ran. Once she realized Gareth wasn't even trying, she slowed down a bit. She didn't need to go full-tilt against Declan, even if he was an elf. She made 'fleet of foot' look embarrassing. Werewolf perks, and also what happened when you ran every single day for twenty-five years.
She still beat him to the stall by a very good measure, despite swinging by Clint's to grab some moonshine without asking, and hung off him as they waited for Gareth to arrive.
"He makes me look mean when he's this nice," she complained to Declan. She considered this. "But I guess I am meaner than him. It's just not that hard. I'm not even that heavy, y'know." She sighed.
"I'll behave," she promised him. For once, she meant it. She wouldn't be making the same mistake twice in one night at the very least. All the rest could wait. He had a way of leaving her very confused and in bad need of time to process.
She rubbed a hand over her face, trying to rub the emotions off of it and the red out of it. It very almost sounded like he was sorry. It almost sounded alarmingly close to regret. Not regret, obviously, because he didn't regret doing it, but... It was a lot. A lot more than she had expected, and if he didn't stop, she was going to cry.
"I'm not sayin' he didn't deserve it," she said pointedly. "I dunno if you remember him. The Duke of Ark? He owned the lands up around and includin' the Great Lake." She was from around there, as far as she knew. All her earliest memories were from around there, anyway. "If y'remember him, y'might remember he was a real piece o' work." She hadn't known it at the time, obviously. No one thought ill of the people who sheltered them, clothed them, fed them. ...Well, except her, but she was talented at that, and also old enough to know better now. "There's a reason he never signed no fuckin' adoption papers. He never meant to. He's not really my dad."
She rubbed her face again, both hands. "I realized. When I saw all the kids in th' fuckin' castle. I don't wanna think about it." She very, very, very strongly didn't. She could see a spiral of madness that way, if she even acknowledged the way things could have been different. "I don't wanna think about it, and I don't want you t'think about it. Those 'ifs' will drive me insane." If he was going to think anything at all about it, she'd prefer he think of the circumstances she did have, and how they turned her into what she was now, for better or worse. "Besides," she added dryly. "You woulda fuckin' hated havin' me around the castle. Imagine all the rats. That shit's why I'm designin' you an orphanage, anyway."
She blinked at him in surprise. He was just full of them tonight, between getting angry about her crush on Gareth to not rubbing her father's death in her face, and now this. "Yer the first person who's fuckin' understood that. I really dunno what that says about me." Prooooobably nothing good, but it still felt nice to be understood.
She narrowed her eyes a bit at his final enunciation, wondering if she was catching his implications correctly. A flush grew on her cheeks regardless, as if volunteering to confirm his suspicions. "Don't rub it in," she grumbled. "We both know I'm an idiot."
Pleased that she'd created what would hopefully become a permanent nickname for Declan(-Directly-To-The-Ground), she bolted off. Declan-Directly-To-The-Ground, to his credit, at least ran. Once she realized Gareth wasn't even trying, she slowed down a bit. She didn't need to go full-tilt against Declan, even if he was an elf. She made 'fleet of foot' look embarrassing. Werewolf perks, and also what happened when you ran every single day for twenty-five years.
She still beat him to the stall by a very good measure, despite swinging by Clint's to grab some moonshine without asking, and hung off him as they waited for Gareth to arrive.
"He makes me look mean when he's this nice," she complained to Declan. She considered this. "But I guess I am meaner than him. It's just not that hard. I'm not even that heavy, y'know." She sighed.
The following 2 users Like SolitareLee's post: liarliaronapyre, Tindome
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Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-05-2019, 06:20 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-05-2019, 06:41 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-05-2019, 07:11 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-05-2019, 07:37 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-05-2019, 07:59 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-06-2019, 03:30 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-06-2019, 04:36 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-06-2019, 07:10 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-06-2019, 08:24 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-06-2019, 09:27 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-06-2019, 09:58 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-06-2019, 10:42 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-06-2019, 11:19 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-06-2019, 12:00 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-06-2019, 12:39 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-06-2019, 01:37 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-06-2019, 02:31 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-06-2019, 03:32 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-06-2019, 04:13 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-06-2019, 11:22 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-07-2019, 05:25 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-07-2019, 08:51 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-07-2019, 09:48 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-07-2019, 12:11 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-07-2019, 01:03 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-08-2019, 02:11 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-08-2019, 03:29 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-08-2019, 04:52 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-08-2019, 05:21 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-09-2019, 03:53 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-09-2019, 04:29 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-10-2019, 11:08 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-10-2019, 11:32 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-10-2019, 04:34 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-10-2019, 05:19 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-11-2019, 01:09 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-11-2019, 03:49 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-11-2019, 06:07 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-11-2019, 07:35 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-11-2019, 10:08 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-11-2019, 11:03 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-11-2019, 04:17 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-11-2019, 04:56 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-12-2019, 04:23 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-12-2019, 06:42 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-12-2019, 11:02 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-12-2019, 11:42 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-22-2019, 02:14 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-22-2019, 03:07 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-22-2019, 10:42 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-22-2019, 11:50 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-22-2019, 02:16 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-22-2019, 02:52 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-22-2019, 03:59 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-22-2019, 05:02 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-23-2019, 01:59 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-23-2019, 02:37 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-23-2019, 03:42 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-23-2019, 05:47 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-23-2019, 10:50 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-23-2019, 11:42 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-23-2019, 01:37 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-23-2019, 02:09 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-23-2019, 03:02 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-23-2019, 03:24 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-23-2019, 04:58 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-23-2019, 05:31 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-24-2019, 11:10 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-24-2019, 11:59 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-24-2019, 01:44 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-24-2019, 02:26 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-24-2019, 11:39 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-25-2019, 12:24 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-25-2019, 09:09 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-25-2019, 09:41 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-25-2019, 12:02 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-25-2019, 12:33 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-25-2019, 03:11 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-25-2019, 03:39 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-25-2019, 11:43 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-26-2019, 06:35 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-26-2019, 01:02 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-26-2019, 01:50 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-26-2019, 03:39 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-26-2019, 04:09 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-27-2019, 04:17 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-27-2019, 07:50 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-27-2019, 03:40 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-27-2019, 04:27 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-28-2019, 10:20 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-28-2019, 10:57 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-28-2019, 01:45 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-28-2019, 02:20 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-29-2019, 06:33 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-29-2019, 07:42 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-29-2019, 08:30 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-29-2019, 08:41 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-29-2019, 09:54 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-29-2019, 10:38 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-29-2019, 12:01 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-29-2019, 12:21 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-29-2019, 01:10 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-29-2019, 01:29 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-29-2019, 01:47 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-29-2019, 02:17 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-29-2019, 02:35 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-29-2019, 02:54 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-29-2019, 04:07 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-29-2019, 04:33 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-29-2019, 04:59 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-29-2019, 05:14 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-29-2019, 11:46 PM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-30-2019, 12:19 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-30-2019, 04:25 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-30-2019, 05:05 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-30-2019, 09:59 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-30-2019, 10:12 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 11-30-2019, 10:29 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 11-30-2019, 10:54 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 12-01-2019, 06:15 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 12-01-2019, 06:47 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 12-01-2019, 08:10 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 12-01-2019, 08:27 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by Tindome - 12-01-2019, 09:11 AM
RE: Beg Off [Closed] - by SolitareLee - 12-01-2019, 09:25 AM